Before COVID19 changed the world, the number of daily abuse cases were ridiculously alarming. With conditions being what they are now, the abused are at a greater risk of being isolated, unable to be seen, or heard, or helped. Especially if you are a child, dependent on someone else for safety and protection as children are sexually abused far more than adults. I know from my role and by being a confidant to too many SURVIVORS of sexual abuse. The numbers are disheartening, and those numbers only reflect the reported incidences. I dare say the majority of cases are not reported. Of the 20 or so survivors that I know, 4 went through the entire legal process, to conviction. The others never told anyone, weren’t believed by their parent/guardian, had no one to advocate for them, or did not want to report it to law enforcement.
I am not a professionally trained counselor or therapist, but I do have empathy, a sound mind, morals, a conscience, an open heart and some type of experience with different kinds of abuse. I would like this blog to be a space for sharing and a place for healing. I think I speak for all of the ladies of Thump In Thought when I say we are here to encourage and offer support when needed and able. If there is anyone who has found themselves here and would like to share but not with our audience, please say so in your message (every message is approved before it’s posted) or email me directly at ThumpInThought@gmail.com.
I also want to encourage you to talk:
- to your children about what’s inappropriate and unacceptable; cover all your bases. Don’t assume you’ve gone over it enough. Reminders never hurt.
- to your children about how to conduct themselves in different situations.
- about what happened to you, how you dealt with it, what you wish you’d done, how it made you feel; it could help others…it will help others…and it just might help you.
- with the understanding that you may not be able to comprehend the dynamics of the abuse, but you must be careful not to be judgmental or presumptive.
- with the attitude that, unless speaking to lawyers, judge and jury, it’s not your job to convince anyone. If you feel you need to be defensive, you probably shouldn’t be talking to that person about that.
- to free themselves and help free others.
- to spread awareness.
- for those too young, too scared, too beat down and/or too victimized to speak up for themselves.
- about setting boundaries and respecting boundaries when it comes to personal space (theirs and others) and sexual activity.
If you need to talk, want to talk, or are afraid to talk, I am here and here is safe.
If you are not ready to or don’t feel like talking you can alternatively do things to balance your 5th (throat) chakra. The throat chakras color is blue like the child abuse prevention ribbon. Meditating with stones such as: blue kyanite, lapis lazuli and using blue color therapy, yoga, singing, chanting, and reciting positive affirmations, are great ways to open and heal your throat chakra. Try one or all of these techniques to dispel fear, frustration and communicate truth.
Some more stones beneficial to healing from abuse black obsidian, rhodonite and carnelian.
Here are some other resources:
Telling Isn’t Tattling by Kathryn M. Hammerseng
A Better Safe Than Sorry Book: A Family Guide For Sexual Assault Prevention by Sol Gordon and Judith Gordon
No More Secrets For Me by Oralee Wachter
Please Tell: A Child’s Story About Sexual Abuse by Jessie Ottenweller
It Happened to Me: A Teens Guide to Overcoming Sexual Abuse by William Lee Carter
Helping Kids Break the Silence of Sexual Abuse by Linda Lee Foltz
I said “NO!”: A kid To Guide to Keeping Your Private Parts Private by Sue Rama
The Grandparents’ Rights: What Every Grandparent Needs to Know by Patricia Slorah
NationalChildAbuseCoalition – 1-800-4-A-Child (1-800-422-4453)